One suggestion – get a ham radio license, carry a walkie-talkie 2-meter radio set to the local “repeater” frequency which is usually monitored by quite a few local people. Start up a conversation and ask for someone to chat with you while you’re walking in sketchy territory.
I recall hearing from women who walked home after dark from work making regular talk appointments with older retired people who sat at their radio day and night for some human contact.
Google “ham cram” and your city to find a way to study for and pass your introductory ham radio exam. It’s quite easy to be licensed, and there’s invariably a good community of ham radio operators in any neighborhood who will be glad to help you out.
Unfortunately people are a bell curve, there are a few great ones, a lot of average ones and a few horrible ones. I always thought that one of the most unfair things in life was that a female could not walk around freely without worrying about some harm coming to them. A male could do the same and the worse they might have to look forward to in general is a bloody nose and the loss of a wallet. It isn’t fair, but it is how it is. I am very glad that you are moving. Hopefully to an area with less mentally ill people. He truly sounds unhinged at best. I am sorry that you had that encounter and ashamed for our species. They never cease to dissapoint me.
I have never had any trouble with rude people, but (as a 13-year-old girl) if I’m more than a quarter mile from my house I’ll be with someone else. I did actually have someone ask me to take a picture of his dog once. I was at a beach photographing gulls, which he didn’t seem to understand, and he acted like I was some silly little kid who would love to photograph his dog instead. I did anyway just to make him go away.
I’m sorry to hear what you’ve been through. Unfortunately, being a woman is much easier to be victim of violence. Still, it happens to me, not that often, but I have some experiences. From robbery attempts (Living in big cities in South America you know where to took out your camera or phone…) to police bothering because you have binoculars or a camera, and they ask questions they should not; or even worse, private security that pretends to forbid you to observe in public places. I don’t have problems to tell anyone what I’m doing in a friendly manner, but if the other part persists on being unfriendly I can play the same game.
I’ve been to Iguazú falls twice and the two times I had disgusting episodes with tourists. The first time I was in the small train that carries you around the park and noticed balloons flying by; by the third time I saw one, I saw that this was a family of tourists releasing balloons for fun - in a national park. To I started yelling at them from the other end of the train and they stopped. I denounced them to the rangers afterwards.
The second time I was taking pictures of a large catfish (actually, this: https://www.inaturalist.org/observations/5948434) when another tourist noticed the fish because of me. He stood next to me and said to his wife “look how he drinks coke” and proceed to drop the content of his glass to the river; once he finished, he started spitting at the fish, all the time standing next to me. I was SO angry and insulted this guy so much it that almost ended up in a fist fight, luckily my ex gf convinced me to just go away.
It also happened to came upon trappers who were ilegally capturing songbirds, in every case I destroyed the cages and freed the birds, and sometimes those who were behind appeared and things escalated quite violently, but since I threatened to call the police they desisted and went away.
I feel bad for anyone who is out in the field and has had issues with other people being unfriendly or out in out right abusive
So I know we all like to be friendly but the fact of the matter is women especially need to be super careful out in the field.
It is a good idea to stay 6 to 10 feet away from anybody at any time, pandemic or not.
As an ex- law enforcement officer, I suggest a couple of things. First of all make sure you have emergency equipment with you that includes a very loud whistle, It will do you no good in your pocket put it around your neck. If you need to carry pepper spray with you then carry it. Take a photograph of the person who is coming toward you you can always delete it later, This way if something does happen you have a photograph of the person and you don’t have to rely on your memory which often times it goes completely blank when anyone is in a state of flight, fight or freeze.
Make certain somebody knows where you are and when you will return.
Your best defense is a good offense and that boils down to situational awareness.
Watching how people interact with other people, and watching how they are watching you, etc.
Don’t engage with people you don’t know. I hate to sound callous but I had a friend who nearly lost her life challenging a bicyclist he was on a trail they shouldn’t have been on and he almost ran her over so she went out to take a photograph of him. Things happened so quickly after that, All she said is “really” he heard her and saw her try to take his photograph and then he jumped off his bike pick her up and threw her down the hill, Badly bruising her body and causing her a very serious concussion.
Don’t be the police out there if you can take information down like somebody’s description for the vehicle that they’ve gotten into, And give that information to the authorities be a ranger or a police officer later on but do not play cop out there. You do not know who you’re dealing with and you do not know whether or not that person is armed or not. And by armed I mean they could have a weapon of any size whether it be a knife or a stick almost anything can be used as a weapon.
That said I have met some wonderful people on the trail who I have now known for decades. And please don’t forget if you don’t feel right about some thing don’t ignore that feeling if you need to excuse yourself and say “oh my God I forgot the time I have an appointment to be at” or whatever. it is also okay to just walk off and leave without saying anything if you need to.
Stay safe, stay sane and have a good time in nature.
Oh, wow, you describe my inner responce! Though I rarely say anything, I know I will sound rude and it will end in verbal fight which I try to avoid, but last months I have to tell almost every taxi driver to stop throughing away garbage out of car windows! Like what’s wrong with them to do that? @mazer thank you a lot for your advices! I’m gonna buy a whistle! I’m afraid to take photos of others, is it legal to do without their perission? I know they can react badly, like the psycho you mentioned.
I don’t think it’s illegal to take a picture if it’s in a public place. It may be a violation of privacy/publicity laws to publish it (e.g. post online) without their permission. That said, I probably would not want to aggravate a confrontational situation by taking unwanted pictures.
I have on occasion though successfully gotten people back on the trail who had climbed up a cliff or waterfall by slowly and demonstratively setting up my tripod, cleaning the lens and putting a filter on my camera, and then pointing it straight at them. They’re either so proud of being jerks that they will do what they can to “ruin” my picture (and I end up with some good ones to share with rangers later) or they’ll quickly and apologetically try to get out of the frame.
Hopefully, that would not happen again. If it did, please be wary of showing the person the photo on your camera (puts you in grabbing range). Since you are at a vulnerable age, I also would suggest to not agree to email any photos. Perhaps say something along the lines of, ‘I imagine you mean well, but I’m not supposed to talk to strangers. I’m sure you understand’.
This seems like a good precaution as @mazer suggests
I’d like to point out that I don’t actually think that was a threatening situation, for several reasons. 1, he seemed pretty uninterested, like he actually thought I was planning to take a picture of his dog and he was indulging me. 2, he just kept on walking, and did not even ask to see the picture. 3, I was with someone else. If I’d been alone it would be different.
Not to mention this is basically advising a woman to do what women have historically been forced to do anyway. Not all countries have laws like Saudi Arabia – a woman may not drive a car without a male relative’s permission – but maybe that’s because social intimidation accomplishes the same goal. Who needs purdah when a woman is afraid to go out?
While I agree it shouldn’t have to be that way, and that by giving advice to “take care” and “go in pairs” we are perhaps reinforcing that injustice, but ultimately on an individual and personal level, keep yourself safe, first and foremost.
Sure… if you feel confident, and if you have the self defence skills to get yourself out of trouble, then I would whole heartedly recommend getting out there as a single woman and setting the norm to be that that is ok, and then it will be slightly safer, and more will feel safer and able to do so, and then it will become more normal even more so…
If you have a fear or unease about a situation, then perhaps do some research into how likely you are to get into trouble. I don’t mean that you should get hyper anxious about all the attacks that maybe do happen, but if you have a fear, and then research and find out that there are never any attacks or reports of harm at the park that you are going to, then perhaps that might alleviate some of your fears. This is akin to fear of flying… when you look into actually how likely you are to be in a life threatening event in an aircraft, it is actually very very low.
…but utimately, please trust your instincts, don’t just go against them just because women shouldn’t have to do this…
… sorry to hear such trouble. That is really unfortunate. Please don’t lose your interest @fffffffff!!! Many of us here on iNat know you and appreciate your work! - My experience was different, so far. Even as a 13 year old boy I was walking along street lights in my village (Switzerland) to catch moths at night, and hardly ever had any trouble. Sometimes it was necessary to use a long pole to get the moths down, or rarely I was climbing the lamp posts. Occasionally, someone saw me do this. Ha ha! People asking questions can be annoying, yes, and to avoid meeting too many, I started going to walk my street lights like at 2am or 3am. I do not recommend that nowadays. I would also be much more careful in cities. Later I purchased my own moth lights and joined a few local friends with similar interests. - The way I handle it in recent years, I bought myself a house near the forest at the periphery of the city I work in, and most of my observations are from inside my property. I can leave a moth light unattended and feel safe there. So far, nobody intruded or came to the fence to ask me questions.
First, I am so sorry you were made to feel uncomfortable by this man (as well as others). I’ve been walking with my son in the woods since he was about 4-years-old and we have had countless odd experiences with single men and male duos and trios. My advice is this…
Always be aware of your surroundings (difficult, while taking photographs, I realize!).
When approached by anyone who makes you feel uneasy, remain calm and appear unshaken. I agree with a previous poster who likened meeting a human to meeting an unfamiliar animal.
Make it clear you have a good understanding of the environment - maybe go so far as to pretend to talk into your phone as if you are actively in communication with a team of naturalists who are within range of your location.
And while it is difficult to do in the moment, try to remember that the majority of individuals who approach another person socially are not literally dangerous - perhaps only awkward.
Also, here in the U.S. I have learned (unfortunately) the majority of suspicious-acting young men (and women) I come across in the woods are doing illegal drugs (heroin is a big problem) or checking on illegal crops (marijuana) they are cultivating. I began using a website for parents that teaches people to look for drug paraphernalia in their teens’ bedrooms and most of the odd trash I find tucked in logs in the woods is drug-related. After realizing this, I began to recognize many of the odd-acting younger men who awkwardly converse with me are probably trying to oversell their reason(s) for being alone in the woods in the middle of the day wearing inappropriate clothing and lacking any sort of hiking/photography gear.
Edited to add: Also…try not to freeze up, if they are asking you questions or speaking a lot, reply politely and confidently. People in the U.S. are usually only aggressive if they perceive they’re successful; when I’m met with someone who believes he or she cannot intimidate me, he/she usually moves on.
I walked into someone’s illegal pot plantation once while birding in the mountains near my home. I was standing in a clearing looking at something when I suddenly realized there was a scruffy-looking guy (well, scruffier-looking than me) squatting down on the other side of the clearing watching me. We chatted for a bit, both wondering what the other was up to. Finally he said “I don’t know you from Adam, but this was my pot farm. But the damn rabbits ate everything.” I glanced down and sure enough there was a mostly-leafless marijuana plant near my feet. The rest of the clearing looked chewed over (maybe rabbits, maybe something else).
The guy seemed philosophical about it all. Even offered me a beer from his cooler.